I have to write something

I have obtained no mental peace lately and that sets up an unfriendly stage.  The reasons are varied although I think exercise would help greatly.  I need a walk and a good swim.  I usually do not swim.  I hate getting wet with cloths on my body.  This is a new revelation of an old situation.  I look back on my life and I seemed to not like wet cloths.  Wet socks inside wet shoes I can tolerate.  I do not like men's bathing suits even if they are non wetting.  I like them on women.

My lack of mental peace comes from lousy sleep, no money, an increasingly grouchy disposition and fat.   Fat seems to get a bad rap from everyone.  My doctor tells me I am fat and my Thyroid is acting up.  He also tells me I am ugly and I now weigh more than him.  I think the thyroid medication is changing my sleep and maybe helping.  I have never had much money so that should not be adding any great stress.  The increasing grouchiness is kind of amusing to me.  I understand why Mr. Raleno was always pointing and yelling.  He was old and probably not sleeping well and needed to blame it on someone.  The kids say that I am mean and not a very good grandpa.  I tell them their expectations are way to high and life is not fair so get away from me.

Partially, I am at sorts because I never get to work on these blogs any more.  I used to write them, let them cook for a few days, review them, change a few things and then submit publish them.  Now I create and shoot.  Also, I want to paint again and I just cannot get the isolation I need. I also feel guilty because I am not doing my studies.  I am trying to learn a new language and I am not practicing enough. 

So I am out of my groove and in a rut if that is posible.