Monday, May 9, 2011

Legend of a Fall

I was actually working Sunday afternoon and while walking back down the long driveway with my sweet SRM-210 Echo weed whacker balanced in one hand.  I stopped and picked up a long stick lying in the yard.  I somehow got the stick between my legs sending me head over heals while trying to save my $200 weed whacker from annihilation.  My face was most important though, not because I am a movie star or anything, I just do not like things hitting my face really hard.  

I do not remember the next few seconds.   My next memory was tumbling.  Not tumbling like a kid on a school mat but tumbling which confirms that inertia is not the friend of a 52 year old overweight land baron.  I cannot even call it "head over heels" because if possible my head and my heels were sort of oozing or cytoplasmodial streaming in the same direction at the same time yet I remember tumbling.  When I opened my eyes (I always close my eyes when I fall, it is more exciting that way and It hurts less) I was staring up, I know "up" because the sky was blue on this day.  I took a quick inventory and nothing seemed cut, broken or pointing the wrong way.  There was no pain. 

I spent the next few instances wondering if anyone had seen me try to gracefully sweep the driveway with my face or if they had, did they film it by change.   I did not hear laughing nor did I hear anything actually.  This event was all mine to do with it what I wanted.  I knew there would be some discomfort tomorrow because the force of 1 or 2 G's was enough to activate my Delayed Memory Hysteria.  DMH is when you fear how you will feel in the morning although you are alright now.  Too much alcohol and car crashes are the most common triggers for DMH.

Anyway, today, my left shoulder and arm are sore.  Nothing to get hysterical about.  I told my wife and daughter, still laughing?  Yep.

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