New Office

Having recently moved my office to a new and unfamiliar area on the second floor, I am still searching for a new, appropriate restroom to use. On this trip, I miscalculated the distance and the ability of my aging bladder control device and had to sprint walk the last five or nine step. The hallway was empty and knowing time was running out, I started the unzip, unbutton procedure with a few steps remaining to the first floor bathroom door. Feeling that I just may make it, I pushed down on the handle and returned my hands to get the zipper down fully, which I did. Unfortunately as I passed the door handle, it grabbed my open zipper and because I am more top heavy than before and because the Dacron blended slacks would not rip, I nearly went head over heels. I was in full pee accident red alert and literally crawled in the bathroom and as i pulled myself up the urinal, I set off the automatic flusher.   I will have to plan better next time.

 

Ten things I know about Fishing part 4

Catching catfish when you are trying to catch anything else.


Fishing in Florida's saltwater, replace "catfish" with "blowfish". This poor creature with dental protrusions will eat any bait and swallow the hook every time. This fish can grow quit large and is very tasty but poisonous.

I always felt sorry for the damn thing. It looked so helpless just flopping around all puffed up. When I was growing up, people would throw the puffer on the ground and leaving them to die. These bad people thought it would keep the population down if they did not throw them back in the water. That is a fairly ignorant view of God's creation. It was considered a garbage fish. Puffers are not fish that live in garbage; in fact, the puffer fish is a reflection of a healthier water system. A healthy river system means more of all kinds of fish including the ones you want to catch. You could also catch a bunch of something we called "Sailors Choice".

We always threw them back in the water. They were not ugly like the blowfish or the catfish. Every once in a while you would catch a large sailors choice and wonder if it was a keeper. Everyone says they are bony and not much meat. We did not eat the saltwater catfish. I do not really know why. On a typical fishing trip you would catch three or four sailor’s choice, small spiny creatures, a blowfish and an ugly cat. We were trying to catch trout.

Ten things I know about fishing part 3

  You cannot make a fish jump on a hook. Even though they have very puny brains, they will not jump on the hook themselves. They have to be hungry. Humans and the neighbor's Belgian Short Hair are the only animals that eat when they are not hungry. I have never seen a fat flounder. I have seen fish in the water looking at my succulent worm and just circle it, never even tasting the squirmy morsel. There was a type of fishing called "snagging" where you caught only really stupid fish, mostly mullet. There was no bait and only a three pronged hook pulled through the water very fast and when it bumped into a fish, it hooked him somewhere. I remember when I was about twelve, getting up early and going fishing with Bobby. Our dads always did it that way so I figured fish must be easier to catch early in the morning while they are having breakfast. I was a paper boy so getting up was not hard and riding the bike through the streets while it was dark was normal. Bobby was always sneaking out at night so he was quite happy to have a reason to be out before the sun came up. We had our bait, frozen shrimp, our poles and our knives. A boy has to have a good knife for fishing. I think we caught a sailor’s choice and that was it. I spent most of the time throwing my knife at a tree trying to stick it like Daniel Boone. I missed the tree and spend two hours looking for my pocket knife. That was the first time I ever remember praying for anything. I asked God to help me find my knife and as we were leaving on our bikes, tired of fishing and because I lost my knife, there it was, off in the distance. How it got there I have no idea but that was a great fishing trip.

  Catching catfish when you are trying to catch anything else Fishing in Florida's saltwater, replace "catfish" with "blowfish". This poor creature with dental protrusions will eat any bait and swallow the hook every time. This fish can grow quit large and is very tasty but poisonous.  I always felt sorry for the damn thing. It looked so helpless just flopping around all puffed up. When I was growing up, people would throw the puffer on the ground and leaving them to die. These bad people thought it would keep the population down if they did not throw them back in the water. That is a fairly ignorant view of God's creation. It was considered a garbage fish. Puffers are not fish that live in garbage; in fact, the puffer fish is a reflection of a healthier water system. A healthy river system means more of all kinds of fish including the ones you want to catch. You could also catch a bunch of something we called "Sailors Choice".  We always threw them back in the water. They were not ugly like the blowfish or the catfish. Every once in a while you would catch a large sailors choice and wonder if it was a keeper. Everyone says they are bony and not much meat. We did not eat the saltwater catfish. I do not really know why. On a typical fishing trip you would catch three or four sailor’s choice, small spiny creatures, a blowfish and an ugly cat. We were trying to catch trout.

Ten things I know about Fishing part 2



pocket fisherman

1. Do not confuse "going fishing" with "catching fish". If catching fish is the goal, then lots of fish equals good fishing. If the fun is in the "going" then there are tons of options. I love fishing as in "going fishing". I really do not care about catching anything. Some people are what my dad called "ambulance chasers". They are a restless lot and they cast a few times and if nothing is caught or no bites, they pick up everything and move to a new spot. To me, that is not fishing, that is being a pain in the butt. Why would anyone want to get all aggravated every ten minutes or so by moving to a new spot. I guess if you want to catch some fish, that may be required but that is not fishing. That is "chasing" fish. I do not chase dogs so I am sure as hell not going to chase a fish unless he has my car keys or something. I chased a baby bull one time and soon it tired of being chased and started chasing me. There is a lesson in there somewhere. Catching fish is exciting. The strong pull on the line, the excitement of catching the "big one". Fish, even the ugly ones are beautiful and amazing. I usually end up throwing every one of them back. I am losing the heart to kill and clean them. I do not consider myself any kind of expert fisherman if I catch a bunch of fish. I just figure the fish are having a bad day and I am just there to make it worse.  I have gone fishing and I have caught fish.  I have gone fishing and not caught fish.  I once caught a fish and was not fishing.  Usually I do not go fishing and do not catch fish but I know the difference. 

Ten things I know about fishing Part 1

This is part of a series of topics I am writing for my grandson's birthday present.  Ryon's boy Micah is a fishing nut.  He has skills.

anyway, this is just the first section.  Every few days I will publish the next section and I will send it to him as a book when I finish it.  (soon)

Ten Things I Know About Fishing

Micah

Fishing is an adventure for fathers and sons all over the world. Teachers, adventurer and old men have a favorite story, technique and fishing spot. Some people are crazy about fishing. Some are crazy with fishing. Many have expensive boats and equipment. They purchase the latest reels and lures. They enter fishing contests just to show off a nice boat. I know a guy that was in a bass fishing contest and he caught fifty eight pounds of carp and catfish but not one bass. He spent $100 on the entry fee, $200 on gas, beer and fishing stuff, had to drag the boat thirty miles, launch the boat at 3:30 AM. He arrived back home at 9:27 PM and had to clean the fish, clean the boat and take a shower. He was in bed by midnight and his fish cost him, after cleaning, eight dollars a pound. You can buy fish at the grocery store for a lot less than that and be home in time to cook it dinner. I do not think he ever ate those fish. His wife always brings up this fishing story whenever company comes around. She laughs loudly when she reminds him that he was disqualified from the contest for having too many gadgets.